Just Another Recovering Person


I’ve listened to “Empire State of Mind” with Jay-Z and Alicia Keys. It’s a catchy tune that I just can’t get out of my mind. I’ve been to New York a couple of times. I didn’t really think though that the city made me feel “Brand New” and the lights blinded me and not “Inspire Me”.

I’m not that big a fan of rap. I can listen to it. Some of it is ok, some of it is shit, just as all music is. There are pieces of classical music I can listen to and feel moved, and there are others that are too off tempo and crammed with unintelligible continuity.

I love music. The thing with music that I have learned is that I always associate a memory with a song. Some believe that music, among other things, are triggers for addicted people. If my whole life and thinking was centered in drugs in one form or another, then everything is a trigger. I believe certain memories, places, songs, are just stronger than others.

I worked out a deal with a business partner to borrow some money to pay off the credit cards I blogged about previously. I sat down with him and was honest about the situation. It will be easier to pay him one payment than pay on 3 that aren’t going anywhere.

Things at home have calmed down for the time being. I’m not holding my breath over anything. we have been in this pattern before. Things are good for a couple of weeks and we end up right back in the same spots. We have tried to keep my daughter busy, giving her little time for bad decision-making to take over.

My son, whom had sleep problems due to nightmares, seems to be doing ok. He has been more pleasant in going to bed and waking up in the mornings. The last 3 day weekend was difficult but he had stayed the night with a friend on Saturday and I believe they stayed up half that night and slept in Sunday causing him not to be tired and he just wanted to stay up and play video games.

A recovery thought today came at lunch when discussing behavior. One fo the guys I was with felt his behavior was unacceptable, especially because this person was in recovery. I reminded him I was in recovery, and my behavior wasn’t always acceptable, but it also didn’t give me an excuse to do whatever I wanted then blame it on being an addict. You know the accountability factor.

Hope all is well with you.
Take Care…Bob D.


Comments on: "Updates…." (2)

  1. I was born in Brooklyn, New York and haven’t been back since I was 10. It’s one of my recovery goals. Maybe this year.

    I’m glad you asked for help with the financial situation. I know it’s a humbling experience. I was raised in a household where it was unacceptable to ask anyone for money. My sponsor said as long as my intention was to pay them back then it was ok. Something about that’s what friends are for. haha.

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